Ever since I had the epidural for my version, my neck has been killing me. I have had to break down and take a Tylenol the last couple of days. I don't take medications, even NOT pregnant, so taking a Tylenol is a big deal. I bear through the discomfort during the day, but at night I took one pill just to help me get a little relief for sleep. Last night I took a pill and used the heating pad on my neck and shoulder. It helped a little.
Here's the post about my most recent epidural experience:
http://hardtobesexy.blogspot.com/2012/08/update-on-ecv.html
There is a less-than-friendly debate going on in the baby-business world. It's the natural vs medicated birth debate.
On might think that because of the issues I've had with the epidural, is be on the natural birth side of the debate. However, I think it is foolish to stand on one side or the other. I think, like the whole feminist movement, we've lost sight of the true purpose of the movement itself.
For the feminist movement, women fought for equality in the workplace...a PLACE in the workplace for them, and the option for jobs in the workplace....among other things. This was a fabulous movement for women. Life as we know it would be very different and I would argue that we still have a long way to go. Think of how people in general react to the idea of a female president...generally with a smug eye roll.
I think what we list sight of is choice and this is the link I see between feminism and childbirth. In the feminism movement, women began to look down on women who stayed home. Instead of being treated like important figures in our country and its future, they were seen more as "kept" women with no personal interests outside child-rearing.
This idea still permeates our society. I challenge a woman to test it. Go to a place where you do not know anyone...go out to a bar or other social event and when someone asks you what you do, tell them you're a stay at home mom. I guarantee the response will be one with minimal to no interest and I bet your conversation won't last long.
Moms and the job of being a mom is not valued in America. Is it valued in other countries? I don't know...I'dlove to know.
The funny thing is, the unfriendly debate among well-intentioned women begins before the child is born! It begins while the woman is pregnant. You have the fanatics on both side of the birth debate.
Like the feminist movement, the intention is good. Women, who once had babies at home with the help of a doctor or neighbor, or skilled midwife, suddenly found themselves thrust into a very impersonal hospital environment that did not give them CHOICE. I know this from experience, because I was given no choice in the birth process with my first son...and that was in1995. Not so long ago.
Then, I arrived for a scheduled induction, because my doctor was going on vacation and wanted to be able to deliver my baby. When I arrived, I was already in labor and dilated to 3cm, but I was given pitocin anyway, because it speeds up the process. Pitocin causes VERY strong contractions and that was the case with me. So they gave me an epidural. It wasn't a question...it was more like, this is what we're going to do.
I was so sick after that and after his birth, I was numb for 6 hours and ran a 104.5 temperture. Because of the temperature, I wasn't allowed to see my baby for 24 hours.
It was a terrible experience that could have been avoided had I not had an epidural.
My second son was a natural birth. It was not an easy birth, because he was posterior, meaning the back of his head.pressed on my tailbone through labor and delivery. This caused terrible back pain that did not let up at all, plus I still had the usual painful contractions.
Posterior Baby
That said, it was easier than my first experience. I arrived at 4 cm and my labor was 6 hours from start to finish. It was slower from 4-7 cm, but went very quickly to 10 after that. I had no epidural, so I was not nauseated...I never threw up and I felt.strong through it all. After I had him, I was wheeled to the recovery room for an hour, I breastfeding him, then I walked to my room while he was being cleaned up. After that, he roomed in with me.
It was so cute, because he would hum each time he exhaled! I loved sitting up and listening to him.
Based on my experience, you'd think is be totally against pain meds, but I'm not.
I stand on the side less talked about. I stand on the side of choice.
CHOICE!
Women need to be given choice and respected for their choice. This MUST include education. You cannot make a choice without knowing what you're choosing between. I was never educated on the risks of an epidural either time I had one! Why? There must be education and doctors should be held accountable for informing their patients in all situations...other than unexpected emergencies, but those better be explained after the fact.
In my opinion, women are either NOT informed about epidurals at all or they are under-informed at best. I'm not alone in my opinion. Here's a link to an excelletn piece about how under-informed women are:
Under-informed
I also believe that epidurals are over-used and again, I am not alone in my opinion. The following link is to an excellent piece from the perspective of a midwife...and a very "senior practitioner," who I happen to agree with. Why? Because he is for CHOICE, but he is for informed choice.
The Over-used Epidural from the Midwife's Muse
I very much appreciate this quote from the piece, "I think epidurals are overused. That they adversely affect the progress of labor. That they change what, for 70% of women is a natural, physiological process into a medical event."
He also states this: "I would never deny a woman her choice of an epidural, in fact there are times when I actually advocate the use of epidurals in labour. What I do attempt to do is support the woman in normal labour, to encourage her to accept that the pain of the contractions is not a sign that something is abnormal but, if she still wants the epidural, then she gets one."
This is precisely why I agree with him completely. I think it's unfortunate that epidurals are almost considered routine, when they absolutely should not be. In most cases, there is truly no need for an epidural. As I have stated in previous posts, the pain from contractions has never killed anyone, but side effects from drugs have.
What women need is education. They need to learn to manage pain very early on in their pregnancies, rather than waiting until the last few weeks to read a book or two and call it a day. For some, this might work. I meditated on a regular basis before I was pregnant with my sons...as a teenager, I even meditated in the snow, while wearing shorts just to see if I could, indeed, block the sensation of cold. Guess what...I can.
I'm not saying women should go to such an extreme for childbirth, but one must learn to control her mind and therefore control her feelings and body. The quickest way to feel pain? Experience fear and uncertainty. During childbirth, fear WILL cause pain.
Fear will cause the screaming you see in the birth scenes in movies...with or without an epidural. One must learn to calm herself, stay focused and remember that all of it has a purpose. It is nothing to be afraid of...your body know what it is doing.
It's so easy to say that, but doing it requires practice.
My thought about it is...see what your body is capable of before you simply request an epidural. I think it is completely irresponsible on the part of doctors and mothers-to-be to request and okay and epidural before labor has even begun, unless there is truly a medical reason for it. I think it's pathetic that pregnant women, especially first time mothers are not allowing themselves the chance to have a natural birth. They don't even know what they are capable of! They don't even know what a contraction feels like! I think it is selfish to say, "I just don't want to be in pain, so I'm getting an epidural," when it DOES cross the placenta.
That said, if you do give it an honest try and you realize you simply cannot continue, by all means, request pain relief and be PROUD of what you did! This is why I support choice...I just don't support "choice" without information and this includes experience. If you plan to have an epidural and have never experienced labor before, then I say, "shame on you." You will separate yourself from the miraculous birth of your baby, risk your own health and the health of your baby to simply skip out on pain. I have no respect for that.
If you give it a try and find you cannot do it and you choose an epidural or other medication, then I say, "Go you!" You gave it a try and I consider you a trooper! You should be proud of yourself.
As I stated previously, this does not pertain to medical situations that require the use of an epidural. That's completely beside the point, but even then, you need to be asking about the risks. Get informed! If your doctor doesn't volunteer the information, ASK. It's your responsibility as a parent to know what's happening to you and your baby.
On a side note:
I'm 39 weeks today and feeling really good. I've had some good contractions, but nothing painful and nothing that even signals real labor yet. My hubby has gone to a concert and I wanted to go so bad, but decided to stay home instead. He's going to see Jello Biafro do a live show and not the spoken word!!!! He's doing all Dead Kennedy's songs! *sigh*
I continue to lose my mucus plug as well...and I've come to the conclusion that maybe if I keep telling myself I'll never go in labor that when it happens, I'll be pleasantly surprised. ;-) K and I are still having sex and instead of thinking about how it might soften my cervix, I've decided to just focus on the fun. It's so much better that way. I'm just relaxing, taking lots of baths, and trying to relish the last few days/weeks I have with my baby girl this close to me. We'll never be this close again.
Here's the post about my most recent epidural experience:
http://hardtobesexy.blogspot.com/2012/08/update-on-ecv.html
There is a less-than-friendly debate going on in the baby-business world. It's the natural vs medicated birth debate.
On might think that because of the issues I've had with the epidural, is be on the natural birth side of the debate. However, I think it is foolish to stand on one side or the other. I think, like the whole feminist movement, we've lost sight of the true purpose of the movement itself.
For the feminist movement, women fought for equality in the workplace...a PLACE in the workplace for them, and the option for jobs in the workplace....among other things. This was a fabulous movement for women. Life as we know it would be very different and I would argue that we still have a long way to go. Think of how people in general react to the idea of a female president...generally with a smug eye roll.
I think what we list sight of is choice and this is the link I see between feminism and childbirth. In the feminism movement, women began to look down on women who stayed home. Instead of being treated like important figures in our country and its future, they were seen more as "kept" women with no personal interests outside child-rearing.
This idea still permeates our society. I challenge a woman to test it. Go to a place where you do not know anyone...go out to a bar or other social event and when someone asks you what you do, tell them you're a stay at home mom. I guarantee the response will be one with minimal to no interest and I bet your conversation won't last long.
Moms and the job of being a mom is not valued in America. Is it valued in other countries? I don't know...I'dlove to know.
The funny thing is, the unfriendly debate among well-intentioned women begins before the child is born! It begins while the woman is pregnant. You have the fanatics on both side of the birth debate.
Like the feminist movement, the intention is good. Women, who once had babies at home with the help of a doctor or neighbor, or skilled midwife, suddenly found themselves thrust into a very impersonal hospital environment that did not give them CHOICE. I know this from experience, because I was given no choice in the birth process with my first son...and that was in1995. Not so long ago.
Then, I arrived for a scheduled induction, because my doctor was going on vacation and wanted to be able to deliver my baby. When I arrived, I was already in labor and dilated to 3cm, but I was given pitocin anyway, because it speeds up the process. Pitocin causes VERY strong contractions and that was the case with me. So they gave me an epidural. It wasn't a question...it was more like, this is what we're going to do.
I was so sick after that and after his birth, I was numb for 6 hours and ran a 104.5 temperture. Because of the temperature, I wasn't allowed to see my baby for 24 hours.
It was a terrible experience that could have been avoided had I not had an epidural.
My second son was a natural birth. It was not an easy birth, because he was posterior, meaning the back of his head.pressed on my tailbone through labor and delivery. This caused terrible back pain that did not let up at all, plus I still had the usual painful contractions.
That said, it was easier than my first experience. I arrived at 4 cm and my labor was 6 hours from start to finish. It was slower from 4-7 cm, but went very quickly to 10 after that. I had no epidural, so I was not nauseated...I never threw up and I felt.strong through it all. After I had him, I was wheeled to the recovery room for an hour, I breastfeding him, then I walked to my room while he was being cleaned up. After that, he roomed in with me.
It was so cute, because he would hum each time he exhaled! I loved sitting up and listening to him.
Based on my experience, you'd think is be totally against pain meds, but I'm not.
I stand on the side less talked about. I stand on the side of choice.
CHOICE!
Women need to be given choice and respected for their choice. This MUST include education. You cannot make a choice without knowing what you're choosing between. I was never educated on the risks of an epidural either time I had one! Why? There must be education and doctors should be held accountable for informing their patients in all situations...other than unexpected emergencies, but those better be explained after the fact.
In my opinion, women are either NOT informed about epidurals at all or they are under-informed at best. I'm not alone in my opinion. Here's a link to an excelletn piece about how under-informed women are:
Under-informed
I also believe that epidurals are over-used and again, I am not alone in my opinion. The following link is to an excellent piece from the perspective of a midwife...and a very "senior practitioner," who I happen to agree with. Why? Because he is for CHOICE, but he is for informed choice.
The Over-used Epidural from the Midwife's Muse
I very much appreciate this quote from the piece, "I think epidurals are overused. That they adversely affect the progress of labor. That they change what, for 70% of women is a natural, physiological process into a medical event."
He also states this: "I would never deny a woman her choice of an epidural, in fact there are times when I actually advocate the use of epidurals in labour. What I do attempt to do is support the woman in normal labour, to encourage her to accept that the pain of the contractions is not a sign that something is abnormal but, if she still wants the epidural, then she gets one."
This is precisely why I agree with him completely. I think it's unfortunate that epidurals are almost considered routine, when they absolutely should not be. In most cases, there is truly no need for an epidural. As I have stated in previous posts, the pain from contractions has never killed anyone, but side effects from drugs have.
What women need is education. They need to learn to manage pain very early on in their pregnancies, rather than waiting until the last few weeks to read a book or two and call it a day. For some, this might work. I meditated on a regular basis before I was pregnant with my sons...as a teenager, I even meditated in the snow, while wearing shorts just to see if I could, indeed, block the sensation of cold. Guess what...I can.
I'm not saying women should go to such an extreme for childbirth, but one must learn to control her mind and therefore control her feelings and body. The quickest way to feel pain? Experience fear and uncertainty. During childbirth, fear WILL cause pain.
Fear will cause the screaming you see in the birth scenes in movies...with or without an epidural. One must learn to calm herself, stay focused and remember that all of it has a purpose. It is nothing to be afraid of...your body know what it is doing.
It's so easy to say that, but doing it requires practice.
My thought about it is...see what your body is capable of before you simply request an epidural. I think it is completely irresponsible on the part of doctors and mothers-to-be to request and okay and epidural before labor has even begun, unless there is truly a medical reason for it. I think it's pathetic that pregnant women, especially first time mothers are not allowing themselves the chance to have a natural birth. They don't even know what they are capable of! They don't even know what a contraction feels like! I think it is selfish to say, "I just don't want to be in pain, so I'm getting an epidural," when it DOES cross the placenta.
That said, if you do give it an honest try and you realize you simply cannot continue, by all means, request pain relief and be PROUD of what you did! This is why I support choice...I just don't support "choice" without information and this includes experience. If you plan to have an epidural and have never experienced labor before, then I say, "shame on you." You will separate yourself from the miraculous birth of your baby, risk your own health and the health of your baby to simply skip out on pain. I have no respect for that.
If you give it a try and find you cannot do it and you choose an epidural or other medication, then I say, "Go you!" You gave it a try and I consider you a trooper! You should be proud of yourself.
As I stated previously, this does not pertain to medical situations that require the use of an epidural. That's completely beside the point, but even then, you need to be asking about the risks. Get informed! If your doctor doesn't volunteer the information, ASK. It's your responsibility as a parent to know what's happening to you and your baby.
On a side note:
I'm 39 weeks today and feeling really good. I've had some good contractions, but nothing painful and nothing that even signals real labor yet. My hubby has gone to a concert and I wanted to go so bad, but decided to stay home instead. He's going to see Jello Biafro do a live show and not the spoken word!!!! He's doing all Dead Kennedy's songs! *sigh*
I continue to lose my mucus plug as well...and I've come to the conclusion that maybe if I keep telling myself I'll never go in labor that when it happens, I'll be pleasantly surprised. ;-) K and I are still having sex and instead of thinking about how it might soften my cervix, I've decided to just focus on the fun. It's so much better that way. I'm just relaxing, taking lots of baths, and trying to relish the last few days/weeks I have with my baby girl this close to me. We'll never be this close again.
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