Thinking about LDR...

So up until the day I went to visit my sister at the hospital to see her and my new niece and nephew, I thought I'd want to have visitors soon after giving birth. However, I'm not so sure now.

I felt bad for C because she had twins, a c-section, was trying to breast feed for the first time and had to pump milk for her little guy who was still in the NICU, plus she was sore from the surgery AND a tubal ligation, and had no chance to rest at all. The poor girl was running on 4 hours of sleep and dealing with that plus having to socialize with well-wishers. We called and asked if we could come up, other people just dropped by. She was a trooper, but I could tell she was exhausted and really needed time alone.

It got me thinking about my own labor, delivery and recovery. I'll not have the pain that she did, because I'm not having a c-section or tubal, but I will be breastfeeding and that requires some privacy. Plus, birth is so damned tiring...I'd really love time with K and the baby before we have to share her with the world.

How do you tell people that though? My mother-in-law has said she wants to be the first person besides K and I to hold her, but I really want that to be my boys. I'd like for us to have family time on our own. School will be in session though, so I don't know how feasible that will be.

I really don't want others to know I'm in labor...I really want to let them know when the baby is born and at a time when we are ready for visitors. Is that mean? I don't know what is right and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings in the process.

I love my in-laws. They are amazing and I'm so incredibly thankful to have them I'm my life...but they have a tendency to be very talkative, and sort of like hanging around for a while. I don't want to have to ask them to leave. K would, if he thought I was tired or if we needed/wanted time to ourselves, so it is good to know he has my back. :-)

My mom will make a quick stop, I'm sure. Since she'll be driving farther, her staying a little bit is understandable, but she will also give us our space and time to get to be a family. Still, I don't want her to come while I'm in labor either.

I wonder if it would be okay to call people when she is born, but ask them to stop by the next day during a certain time frame. That might work. :-) I keep talking about our parents, but my aunt and our close friends will want to visit too. We have a lot of friends who will want to stop by, so my fear of bombardment is not irrational.

*Sigh*

Why must things be difficult? Basically I want to he comfortable, to enjoy time with my husband and baby and my boys (unless they are in school), and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings in the process.