I've made my decision. Yeah, for sure, at least I think so...because I don't think I can take another night of bad dreams about being powerless to stop the onslaught of ill-intentioned people.
Of course that's not the disposition of my doctor, but it is the disposition of the crazy people in my dreams!
So I've been really upset about the doctor's order for extra monitoring and I've talked to a lot of women about it. It seems that those who go to OBs routinely get the additional monitoring for their AMA status, while those who have midwives do not and are actually told that it's unnecessary unless you go past your due date and then they are routine for all women regardless of age.
My doctor even told me that there is no magic switch that goes off at age 35 to create higher risks. She said that age doesn't really increase my risks for anything really, it's just that the pool of older women having babies is smaller than the pool of younger women having babies...so the statistics are skewed.
So, why did she make this order for me, when I have no other issues?
I think it's mandated for OBs.
My thoughts at this point are to decline the additional monitoring. However, I'm thinking about going to the first week's worth...but not totally sure yet.
I keep thinking...what if something bad happens? But then, something bad could happen to anyone at any time. Something bad could have happened when I was severely underweight while prego with my boys! No additional monitoring was done then. Probably because I had the same doctor my grandma did. lol He was so old school and laid back and well, I LIKED that!
Also, if my amniotic fluid IS low, the procedure to replenish it is invasive and increases my risk of pre-term labor. How is that better? Really? Someone, enlighten me, because I don't get it.
As for the NST...wouldn't they start with a kick count sheet to monitor the baby's movement and then, if there is any doubt about the baby's well-being, try further monitoring? To me it seems ridiculous to jump to rigorous monitoring.
I also have to remind myself that women have been having babies for CENTURIES without all of this invasive bullshit. Was it an act of God, a miracle that was worked then, but isn't worked in the modern age? I think not and I'm tired of being treated like my body is incapable of carrying this amazing baby to term.
My boys were both born at full-term, but on the sooner side of that, considering full-term is 37 - 42 weeks. they were both born at 38 and 39 weeks.
I'm tired of being treated like a statistic. I'm a woman. I'm an individual. My baby is PRECIOUS, I don't give a fuck if you've seen 50 of them that day. She is SPECIAL. I want her held like she's the miracle she is...instead of coldly handled like another product you've pulled out into the world. With my sons, I had a terrible first experience and a wonderful second experience. I know there are GOOD hospitals and nurses (let's face it, the doctors are worthless...you see them the 5 minutes you chat with them at each appointment and you see them just before the birth..the nurses are what's important) and there are TERRIBLE hospitals and nurses. I've heard Good Samaritan is a good hospital, so I'm really hoping this is true.
The last two times I've gone, they've forgotten me. First was the anatomy scan. I registered downstairs, then registered upstairs, went to the waiting room and WAITED for over an hour. Then a girl came out and asked what I was waiting for. I told her...she came back, "Oh I'm so sorry, we thought you were a no-show." Uh....ok.
The second time was for my Rhogam shot. I waited for 45 minutes as I watched pregnant women come an go. Based on their belly bumps, I'm assuming they were there for the same reason. I was forgotten again.
My thought is, I'm glad I'm going for a second natural birth, because even if I wanted an epidural, I may be forgotten and never get it. ;-) I'm kidding, really...sort of...September is a busy birth month, so it's not completely ridiculous to think they may not get around to giving me an epidural if I wanted one.
Truly, I'm going to labor at home as long as possible before I go to the hospital. I made my birth plan today. Very simple...hopefully all will go well and labor will be relatively smooth. I labored 6 hours for each of my boys, so I hope this little girl is the same or at least similar. Here's the plan:
Of course that's not the disposition of my doctor, but it is the disposition of the crazy people in my dreams!
So I've been really upset about the doctor's order for extra monitoring and I've talked to a lot of women about it. It seems that those who go to OBs routinely get the additional monitoring for their AMA status, while those who have midwives do not and are actually told that it's unnecessary unless you go past your due date and then they are routine for all women regardless of age.
My doctor even told me that there is no magic switch that goes off at age 35 to create higher risks. She said that age doesn't really increase my risks for anything really, it's just that the pool of older women having babies is smaller than the pool of younger women having babies...so the statistics are skewed.
So, why did she make this order for me, when I have no other issues?
I think it's mandated for OBs.
My thoughts at this point are to decline the additional monitoring. However, I'm thinking about going to the first week's worth...but not totally sure yet.
I keep thinking...what if something bad happens? But then, something bad could happen to anyone at any time. Something bad could have happened when I was severely underweight while prego with my boys! No additional monitoring was done then. Probably because I had the same doctor my grandma did. lol He was so old school and laid back and well, I LIKED that!
Also, if my amniotic fluid IS low, the procedure to replenish it is invasive and increases my risk of pre-term labor. How is that better? Really? Someone, enlighten me, because I don't get it.
As for the NST...wouldn't they start with a kick count sheet to monitor the baby's movement and then, if there is any doubt about the baby's well-being, try further monitoring? To me it seems ridiculous to jump to rigorous monitoring.
I also have to remind myself that women have been having babies for CENTURIES without all of this invasive bullshit. Was it an act of God, a miracle that was worked then, but isn't worked in the modern age? I think not and I'm tired of being treated like my body is incapable of carrying this amazing baby to term.
My boys were both born at full-term, but on the sooner side of that, considering full-term is 37 - 42 weeks. they were both born at 38 and 39 weeks.
I'm tired of being treated like a statistic. I'm a woman. I'm an individual. My baby is PRECIOUS, I don't give a fuck if you've seen 50 of them that day. She is SPECIAL. I want her held like she's the miracle she is...instead of coldly handled like another product you've pulled out into the world. With my sons, I had a terrible first experience and a wonderful second experience. I know there are GOOD hospitals and nurses (let's face it, the doctors are worthless...you see them the 5 minutes you chat with them at each appointment and you see them just before the birth..the nurses are what's important) and there are TERRIBLE hospitals and nurses. I've heard Good Samaritan is a good hospital, so I'm really hoping this is true.
The last two times I've gone, they've forgotten me. First was the anatomy scan. I registered downstairs, then registered upstairs, went to the waiting room and WAITED for over an hour. Then a girl came out and asked what I was waiting for. I told her...she came back, "Oh I'm so sorry, we thought you were a no-show." Uh....ok.
The second time was for my Rhogam shot. I waited for 45 minutes as I watched pregnant women come an go. Based on their belly bumps, I'm assuming they were there for the same reason. I was forgotten again.
My thought is, I'm glad I'm going for a second natural birth, because even if I wanted an epidural, I may be forgotten and never get it. ;-) I'm kidding, really...sort of...September is a busy birth month, so it's not completely ridiculous to think they may not get around to giving me an epidural if I wanted one.
Truly, I'm going to labor at home as long as possible before I go to the hospital. I made my birth plan today. Very simple...hopefully all will go well and labor will be relatively smooth. I labored 6 hours for each of my boys, so I hope this little girl is the same or at least similar. Here's the plan:
Birth Plan for
______ & _____'s Baby Girl
Labor Plan:
I want another natural birth:
Please do not offer pain medication
I do not want Pitocin to speed up contractions
Water may be broken, as needed to speed up labor
I want to be able to walk, change positions, & use a tub for labor
Intermittent baby monitoring
Minimal cervical checks
*** In case of emergency, do whatever it takes to make baby and me safe***
Delivery:
K____ in delivery room with me
Please, no episiotomy
K_____ asked to cut umbilical cord (he may decline)
I’d like to have skin-to-skin contact immediately after birth
I’d like to breastfeed ASAP after birth
Post-delivery:
I want my baby to room-in with me
I’d like to stay the minimal amount of time possible
Thank you so much!
Seems almost silly to have to make a plan like this. It seems like common sense to me. Right? I'm not requesting soft music, certain foods, a massage...lol. Just basically hands-off care. I got it with T, why not with this one?
I want to be an advocate for expectant moms. I'm seriously thinking about becoming a certified doula. Even if I go back to teaching, I can still be a doula. I'd like to be the voice for parents-to-be, when they are in situations that tend to ignore their voices. I want to help be a source of calm and strength for laboring mamas. I also still very much want to open my shop & have natural birth classes and breastfeeding classes available to expectant parents.
I have plans...this pregnancy has really helped me figure out where I want to be in this big world. I'm feeling good.
OH...and PS. I've decided to just be laid back about people visiting in the hospital. K said if I'm too tired or need privacy to nurse, he'll have my back. I know he will; I trust him, so I'm just going to go with it. It'll be exciting to show off my baby girl. :)
OH...and PS. I've decided to just be laid back about people visiting in the hospital. K said if I'm too tired or need privacy to nurse, he'll have my back. I know he will; I trust him, so I'm just going to go with it. It'll be exciting to show off my baby girl. :)
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