Job Hunting?

For whatever reason, I have applied to 2 part-time jobs. Not even sure if I want either, but I applied. I'm so torn on the idea of working outside the house. I'm not convinced I can leave little girl to do it. I'm totally not sure if I can trust someone else to care for her in my absence.

It's a tough call.

Anyway, I applied. That means absolutely nothing. I may not even get a call for an interview and even if I do, it doesn't mean I have to accept.

The thing is, I want my own cash, even if it is just a little extra. I want to be able to do things not baby-related, but at the same time I don't want to leave her!

Ugh.

Is there an answer to this? Is balance truly possible when you're a mother?

I'm not even sure.

It's so funny how other women make it look effortless. I was told this when I had my sons, who are 14 months apart. People said I made it look easy. It totally wasn't. I felt guilty for working, but not working wasn't possible. I felt guilty for not doing this or that or for doing too much of this or that.

I guess it goes with the territory.

Anyway...my name is out there again. I think I'll approach it this way. Should the PERFECT opportunity present itself, I'll jump on it. Otherwise, I'll graciously decline.

To all the working moms out there who are trying to balance home and "office," cheers to you. I hope you appreciate yourself as much as everyone around you should.