Eating Better - Where Do you begin? Maybe I can help.

This will be a weekly post to help you discover new, healthier foods.

I'm going to start by saying I'm not a nutritionist, although I'm entertaining the idea of going back to school to be one. I'm not a dietitian. I'm just a woman who has made the slow (and sometime arduous) journey from a 15-year long eating disorder to a healthy, active, woman who is now holding a bit of muscle on her frame.

I know...you think, "Well I don't have an eating disorder, so I can close this and not read anymore."
Hold up. Don't leave yet. Give this one post a chance.

My eating disorder started when I was 15 years old and my brother, who was angry with me at the time, said to me, "Get your fat ass off the couch."

Now, I was 15 years old and I was a late bloomer, so my body was just starting to change and I felt as most young girls do....awkward as hell, so when he said this, it hit me so hard. I already felt like I was getting "fat" and his words solidified that idea.

Let me tell you that I in no way whatsoever blame my brother. He was just angry and it came out. Looking back on that moment, I also know very well that I was not fat at all. I was 5'8" and weighed 130 pounds. That's not fat at all.

However, at the time, I thought it was.

I stopped eating and when I got hungry, I'd drink a Splash drink my mom was selling through NuSkin at the time. When I got so hungry I couldn't stand it, I'd hit McDonald's or grab my most favorite snack: a Swiss Cake Roll...or two or three.

It was a never ending cycle...and this basic cycle continued for 15 years. During my worst time, I was allowing myself a maximum of 500 calories a day. I knew how many calories were in 10 grapes, a tablespoon of nonfat yogurt...I refused to eat meat, not because of moral reasons, but because it "made me feel fat." I began taking laxatives...poisoning my body to make it empty.

At that point, I weighed 108. I had no muscle tone...I was just skinny. My skin was in sad shape, dry and dull. I was tired constantly. What was the worst was that I never felt like enough. I kept making my goal a smaller number on the scale. I had this idea that if I could "just reach that number, I'll be happy."

It wasn't until I was at work (I was a teacher at the time) and I was so sick from all the laxatives that I had to leave early. The assistant principal said I literally "looked green," and asked if it was the flu. I lied, of course, and said it was a stomach virus. No, I did it to myself. I ended up drinking barium and getting an MRI to see what was wrong with me....all because I refused to admit that I had a problem.

During this time, my ex-husband and I were also consuming 1-2 bottles of wine every single night.

Then one day I decided I had had enough. I wanted to get better. I talked to a therapist one day, but even with her I was only partially honest and I realized there was no way for me personally (I DO NOT recommend this to anyone....Don't try to do it on your own) to truly reach out for help from another person. So, I didn't go back to my therapist, but I did take her advice about the food journal.

I also started running here and there, outside, not on a treadmill like a rodent. I ran...I ran from myself and from my (then) husband. I ran from my children. I ran from it all. I didn't run far, of course, I had no energy for that, but I still ran and it became a positive escape.

To run, the body needs fuel and that's when I started want to learn about food. Good food. I read Michael Pollan's book The Omnivore's Dilemma and began to learn about how bad the food industry was. From there, I started watching documentaries. I think at that time Supersize Me was the only one on Netflix. It truly resonated with me.

I began to add more veggies to my plate (not hard because that's all I'd eat). I learned about plant-based proteins, etc.

I was on a roll...then I got divorced. Met a new man and remarried and got pregnant with my daughter. That's when I REALLY made a point to get healthy. I gained 30 pounds while pregnant and gave birth to a healthy 8 pound 6 ounce girl - my biggest of the three. I ate food for fuel. I didn't see it as good or bad. I nursed her for 23 months.

She showed signs of a lactose sensitivity while I was nursing her, so I cut dairy and began trying almond, flax, and coconut milks...and never went back to bland cow's milk! I realized I was missing out all those years! And that got me thinking...what else am I missing out on?

I was nursing all. the. time, so I began watching documentaries about the food industry...about juicing...about veganism. I tried all of it, just to see if there was any merit to the noise.

I got a juicer and juiced daily to be sure I was giving Kathryn all the nutrients she needed. I began to feel better. More energetic, buoyant...for lack of a better word.

Then I tried going vegan and I did it for 10 months. I did go back to mostly veg, but I learned so much during those 10 months. I tried foods I'd never even heard of, that have become a staple in my diet today, like quinoa and kale and endive. Some say I "failed" because I didn't stick with it....but I completely disagree. I tried it. During that time, I saved many, many, many animals and I learned a better way to eat. A better way to view food. I learned to be THANKFUL for the animals I consume. I learned to shop responsibly...to buy local...to eat organic whenever possible.

That's NOT a failure.
It was a win, for sure.

Today, I'm mostly vegetarian, but I do eat local meats and if not local, the organic. I consume very little red meat. If I want a burger, I hit Mad Mike's and get a Mad Cali with a veggie patty. I "eat the rainbow." My plate is always colorful.

As a matter of fact, that's my motto with eating healthy. Make your plate colorful.

How do you do that when the only veggies you routinely eat are white potatoes, tomato, & iceberg lettuce?

On your next shopping trip, grab a new veggie. I don't care if you can't pronounce it. Get it. Then, after you put your groceries away, google it for a recipe. Make it and try it. If you hate it, fine, way to go! You tried it!!!! If you love it....yay, buy it again next time and also grab another NEW veggie or fruit and go through the process again.

You will be pleasantly surprised by what you'll discover you like. AND you get out of that boring food rut.

Here's a start for you:

Skip the iceberg lettuce (it has no nutritional value...it's water) & grab Boston lettuce, fresh spinach, and endive instead. make a salad as you usually would....except if you're a heavy dressing user, cut back 1 teaspoon.